Been Away For Far Too Long - But I'm Back!

[DavidKW]

Hello all at comics UK.

I used to contribute a lot to this site, but I've been away a long while. I wrote a post on my "Long Hiatus" away in 2018, but this one's been even longer - perhaps a record for member of this site?

Since I last wrote, I've been through a lot, with some health battles, both physical and mental, and have had many distractions as well. I found the whole Covid periods of lockdown very difficult, and it dented my momentum in a lot of things including comic collecting and trips out to collect comics.

But my interest in both collecting comics and talking about them has never wavered, and is finally increasing to full steam again.

I've still been collecting comics and soon I'll give a summary of what I've since collecting since the last time I wrote about some 5 years ago.

I have been keeping myself very busy, largely campaigning for people with Autism; I was diagnosed at aged almost 47 some 6 years ago, one of the "lost generation" forced to be a square peg in a round hole; I use much of my lived experience and frustrations to contribute to a many groups and I have also been doing some writing about my experiences, which I've either had read out or published (not for any fee though).

In conversations, I've mentioned my condition with some other comic collectors and dealers and many understand and have said they feel many collectors are ASD anyway (although at Manchester Comic Fair I have run into an old acquaintance from when I lived in Stockport (I'm based in Leigh now) a few times and when I mentioned my condition first time he said "you don't look Autistic which I've learned is the very wrong thing to say; subsequent chance meetings with him have him claim he understands my condition now, but he doesn't from what he's said).

I still spent much time sorting my comic and other growing collections of CDs and DVDs and old magazines, and well as doing voluntary help for the charity which housed me (I'm very lucky and grateful). Oh, and I watch Talking Pictures TV a lot and have contributed information which has been read out on "The Footage Detectives", and attended both TPTV events in Manchester.

I've got much to say on this site, and hope to this time continue to a lot longer with fewer long hiatuses away.

[jim244]

Hi David,
I'm pretty new around here but let me be the first to wish you a warm welcome back.
Congrats on "The Footage Detectives",a brilliant TV Archive series.
Sorry to hear about your health battles but brilliant that you are doing well.
A friend of mine,chap that works for me,has autism.
It is an incredibly debilitating condition and often really difficult to diagnose.
All love and best wishes to you
Ian

[DavidKW]

Thanks Ian, sorry the the very long time in replying.

Autism isn't very easy to detect or diagnose, but I found it was worth it in the end. For so many years I was forced to "mask" just to survive, which I always found very draining (people tell me it was a miracle I did survive given all that was around me).

It's still a postcode lottery as to what help is available, which I feel is wrong and speak a lot about.

I've been keeping very busy with my many Autism groups and writing, and I recently completed and passed via the NHS Oliver McGowan training and approval; I'm very must next week giving my experiences to some Autism awareness training session.

Comics are still great to keep me going and help me relax, both in past and present.

[jim244]

David,it's great to hear that you are doing so well.
Although my actual job is that of a Chef/Catering Manager,I am also a MHFA for my company.
I got involved as my wife suffers from bi polar disorder.

There is sadly not much help out there,if you ever want a chat just PM me.
Take care my friend.

[stevezodiac]

I believe I have Aspergers but I wouldn't say I suffer from it, in some ways it's a gift. At work I was a perfectionist making sure every 'I' was dotted and every 'T' crossed. I hated seeing people cutting corners and being slapdash. I was glad I retired when I did as, seeing young colleagues unable to leave their mobile phones alone for more than a few minutes, was sending me mad with intolerance. My phone stayed in my bag all day (to this day the only calls I have on it are from doctor or hospital as I don't like speaking on the phone). I've thought of speaking to my GP but I'm not sure if the NHS actually bothers with a diagnosis for this condition. My three nieces find it amusing that I don't give them a goodbye kiss but I do manage a cuddle.

[DavidKW]

Thanks very much for your messages Jim and Steve.

I was very much the same when I was working from my mid 20s onwards: very much a perfectionist and by the book (to some colleagues disapproval. But then, they knew how to get away with it, whilst I never could). In fact I was told that my immediate director at a travel firm I worked for 8 years used to complement me to others about how well I "dotted the I's and crossed the T's". Unfortunately, that was until she was one of those directors who pulled the strings to have what was once a family firm be taken over by a corporate private equity firm. Soon, the company which once believed in a positive workplace with good morale all round forced all the founder family members out and became an increasingly unpleasant place to work, culminating with unrealistic targets for staff and a move to new open plan offices (not good for those with Autism) in the middle of nowhere amongst busy traffic. Worst, she now just aggressively treated me publicly and refer to me as "David in the corner" like I was nothing and clearly gave orders which turned the screw to sat me up to fail and trigger stressful situations. She and my manager whom I once had a good work relationship with clearly wanted me gone. The counsellor I saw in the workplace was no help and not once did the "A" word merge about me. And all this takeover was because my director wanted her own swimming poll, and likely my manager wanted a directorship which he thought he'd get by driving me out (he didn't get one anyway and left soon after).

I've been part of a few Autism and Employability sub-groups having had many unpleasant experiences (one I also mention of comics tv re: murderer graham Young) which I tell people of. On of the think I speak a lot of is for there to be some protection for people with Autism in workplaces when/if companies are taken over and/or get new management. The trouble is so much employment is cut and thrust and are run by big global corporate firms where people are just numbers, expected to be robots, all with decisions made by directors who have never done the actual shop floor work.

I will say Steve, it's up to you if you want to be diagnosed. In my perspective it was worth it, it helped explain a lot about me and taught me to slowly like myself; it made me understand what triggers by meltdowns and odd behaviours and what can be done to avoid these. Also, it opened the door to many Autism groups and self-help groups which I enjoy contributing to.

The only big trouble is that it took me a year to get my diagnosis (I was close to burn-out and very stressed when I first sought one, so a year of hell awaited), now I believe it's even longer than that. Plus it's still a postcode lottery as to what pre and post diagnosis there is, which I feel is very wrong. One of the many reasons why I campaign a lot.

[stevezodiac]

One of my favourite TV shows is Bones an the lead character, Temperance Brennan, is autistic so has no mental safety measures in place when it comes to conversations with others. She is a pathologist and when the wife of a car bomb victim asked when she could have her husband's body Temperance replied "as soon as we've finished scraping his remains from the inside of the car".

A manager once emailed all staff in my department and it started with "morning". I replied that "morning" is a verbal contraction and in writing she should have said "good morning". Wasn't well received. I always had a book when travelling to work on the tube as I hated it when people sitting opposite just stared ahead, burying my face in a book removed the discomfiture.